Dear friend,

If I do not wish to listen to your nonsensical ramblings any more, I will usually tell you. I am the first one who talks bullshit for hours, so I know a lot about being annoying..! But if you are just being as stupid as a goat in what you are saying, I will get SO annoyed and pissed at you, that chances are I will ignore you for days. Let me explain where this anger comes from, now.

I love listening to people. When they tell me about events, stories, things, feelings, projects, things, anything. When I pass by someone on the street, I cannot help but wish I knew at least THREE things about him/her. I was not even joking when I said that my best parameter will always be “I cannot have sex with you unless I know your favourite ice-cream flavour”. There are so many people I see around, once in a lifetime or everyday, that I know absolutely nothing of -whereas I like knowing what someone’s typical expressions are, their little gestures when they speak, their favourite words, blablabla. All this creepy stuff I feel really creepy even mentioning!

Back to my point: I like listening to people because I want to KNOW them. Especially those people that I feel are somehow “interesting” -not scientifically speaking, I am not some crazy Mengele!. Just those people with ideas, I mean.

What I really cannot stand, though, are people always putting themselves down. There’s a fine line between acknowledging reality and being dramatic.

For instance, if you question me about it, or if you simply pay me a compliment, I will simply say that I am ugly. And I am not fishing for (more) compliments or reassurance: I am stating the truth and I am honest in saying it. I know I do not have nice features and that I do have a terrible skin, and I do not need people to lie: I am fine because at least I am aware of that. BUT when someone who is clearly aware of the fact that he is intelligent keeps saying he is stupid… that really annoys me to no end.

I was talking to a friend and he would keep saying that “X will never like” him, because he is “ugly and stupid”. Five seconds later, he would say that he has been trying to woo X, because he’d like X to fancy him. Now… I am afraid that you really are stupid, friend. You don’t go around saying you are stupid and horrible looking, just so that you can say you want the most amazing boy in the world (according to your own words) to like you, right?! You are CLEARLY trying to dramatise everything, here. It’s either that you believe you are just horrible, OR that you are amazing enough to win this X’s favour. Not both at the same time, unless you have been diagnosed with schizophrenia.

After I told him that I thought he was not coherent, he said that he actually believes he does not ‘deserve’ X, still he wishes for some interest from X. Again, back to my own experience and perception: if I do not believe that I am good enough, I will simply avoid going for it. You do not start a race knowing that your training will not support you for the whole of it, right?! So he was just saying things because a little bit of drama feels nice, interesting, ‘dramatic’.

I totally HATE this kind of thing. It’s just about making me waste my mental resources: I do honestly stress out a lot if I know a friend is not feeling at his best. When I am about to break down, I can calm myself and feel better. If I know that someone else is, though… that is just painful because I cannot do much. Which is also the reason why I am not going to put my friends in that position -I have kept everything bottled up for as long as I could before asking an advice just not to interfere with a friend’s good mood more than once.

But if I am getting all worried just because you are feeling a drama queen tonight, do not expect me to even greet you next time we cross paths.

This said, my dear O., make up your mind and grow up. Con Affetto.

 

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